Welcome to An Inner Walk-About

There is an inner landscape that sounds the wild call for stillness. It is both empty and cognizant at the same time. We may fall into its desert and become lost. Here, we may disappear, dissolve, die before we die. We are searching for a life, fully lived.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Journey to the Well: Final Thoughts

The story of Amy’s developmental stages in several previous posts called “Journey to the Well” has perhaps shed some light into the harsh landscape of our conditioning. As I ponder the nature and purpose of the social mind programs, which operate to modify the lens we look through at life, I am astonished at the magnitude of their reach into all aspects of our experience.
Just like Amy, had I continued to seek refuge in the social mind agendas, I would have come to a dry well. The thirst for a vibrant life would still burn in my heart.

How honest can we be about the social mind fears that take authority over our lives? Do we even consider that each fear harnesses a percentage of vital life force from our energetic circuit? Are we aware enough to notice when we have hooked into the program, and when limited energetic integrity is actually left for our own use?

If so little energy is left, how do we access guidance about what life brings us? Will we be able to access the intuitive voice that lets us know the appropriate time to move our family, exit a relationship, end a job, begin a new career, risk a new direction or a new friendship, if we run this intuitive energy through the entire social mind fear agenda? Can we illuminate the dark shadow created by the consuming chatter from the fear agenda and touch our natural trust. The shadow is precisely what we have repeatedly hooked into and empowered.

Often, we end up ignoring the ringing internal guidance and postpone our natural alignment with life. Now the pressure from the ignored guidance builds up. Each ignored intuition adds to our system’s fire. The result of this refusal to attend to what guidance points us toward, will literally railroad us through the feared hardships in order to complete an act of surrender. Life will force us to our knees in a sheer act of love. It will drag us from resistance to receptivity. Can we see these experiences as “love coming back for us”? Can we recognize these experiences as water from the well ?

As life faithfully creates an environment that invites awareness about resistance, it frees up the external focus in our life. It offers many opportunities to retrieve the disowned, lost and denied fragments. Our awareness becomes “soul retrieval” work. We become our own shaman.

Let’s consider that we have participated in fueling the social mind programs instead of our own life. We can do so without making ourselves wrong or feeling shame about this participation. We could observe this fact through the compassionate lens our evolutionary history. For thousands of years allegiance to the village or tribe was necessary for survival. It guaranteed our biological safety. This is deeply programmed into our genetics and continues to operate in our desire for assurances about the external world. With this in mind, are the institutions that offer such things as insurances, savings accounts, contracts, and safety rules, not operating with the same survival-safety agendas? Are they not hooked into physical outcome in the external world? Can we notice that this "savior-ship" model may no longer be congruent with who we are becoming?

Dare I extend these observations to our religious institutions? I am not speaking about the enlightened beings that walked the earth. I am referring to the doctrines that arose around these enlightened souls and became enslavers of our own internal guidance? Did the original message become absorbed by a group mind that institutionalized our spiritual lives? Has this mechanism entombed the” living” spiritual truths of our blessed prophets into dead doctrines? Where is the living water?

To disengage from all these programs and beliefs would shift the power from the village back to our precious lives. Responsibility could be handed back to us as individuals. And as the social mind viewpoint about how life works comes into question, we can stop blaming the village. We can quench the thirst and drink from our own well.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Journey to the Well: Part Three

In the last few postings of "Journey to the Well", we have followed our precious Amy and witnessed her precarious first two developmental stages unfold (postings 3/29, 4/3 and 4/29). In the final phase of Amy’s story we watch the development of her intellect, personal values and attitudes. This third stage acts as her ego’s powerhouse and governs her thoughts. Here, she may develop the will to reveal the truth. Here, also, she may develop the automatic response to retreat from truth through her defense strategies.

By the time she arrives at this level of consciousness, she has already been deeply impacted, perhaps wounded, at levels one and two. At this next level, she could solidify an image or identity and experience a limiting, fixed sense of self. As this false self continues the dance, Amy could spin further and further from the core of her true nature. Now the dance-steps take on a more dramatic texture, solid features and routines.

The energy of this third stage is intended for the development of Amy’s personal integrity, an honor code with herself. The boundaries, the ethics of what she will actually negotiate or where she will draw the line, spring from here. Her self-respect, self- trust and her confidence for acting with personal power in the world originate here in her solar plexus, which is the energetic source of this third stage. What will happen to her intuition and inner guidance if her eyes stay fixed on Mr. SM?
Will she channel her intuitive voice out of her own being for use by Mr. SM’s safety/comfort paradigm?

Addictions to external status symbols, the need to categorize, materialism, and performance anxiety could all erupt from here. Will Amy become confused or will she begin to question who she really is and how she can connect to others authentically?
This is the point where Amy can buy into what the social mind has decides is the correct, attractive image. This is the stage at which she can be totally absorbed and subjugate her personal guidance to the social mind standard. Allegiance to its fears could become Amy’s lot. Fears about being alone, about failure, about being wrong and criticized, about being abandoned, being worthless, unwanted and unloved can haunt her. Fears about being rejected and punished, and beliefs about overwhelming loss could become the anxious undercurrent of her precious life.

The society’s demand for obedience to its institutions, structures and forms can appear so real, that Amy may fall into the habit of pleasing others instead of herself. We wonder if she will compromise her personal honor code. Will she become trapped by a lack of self–awareness, siphon off her internal energy and be pulled into the external world? Will she allow other people and situations to become energetically charged by the attention she projects out toward them? Will we see her create an imitation reality that cuts her off from what is actually real?

We hold our breath and pray that Amy’s life remains her own. We plead with her to not become compelled, to not attach to stories that make gods out of a world obsessed by power, dominance, and separatism. We beg Amy to not allow society’s success symbols to become the addictions that medicate the pain of a fragmented life-dance.

Dearest Amy, please do not dedicate your life force to fuel who you are not. See through the hypnotic dance rhythm of your partner, Mr. Social Mind, and keep just the lightest touch on his arm. Break free of his embrace and leap into your own masterful steps. Take refuge in your heart’s intelligence and let it lead you into the mystery, the unknown territory that is so vibrantly alive.

May this small window into Amy's story activate the deepest compassion and understanding for all our conditioning and the suffering it brings. May it offer more awareness to the tight rope we walk as long as we remain invested in the social mind fears. May we recognize how we will attract the mirror image of these fears to our life in the form of relationships and events that prove them true. And may we remember that in this human experience we would so often rather be “right” than “happy”.